There’s been a lot on my mind lately, to be honest. 2017 has felt like the sort of year where I’m going to have to put that extra effort in to decide what I want to get out of it. And it’s only February.
I’ve consciously stopped blogging for a few weeks because I realised one fundamental thing that made me stop in my tracks and assess things.
I don’t gain anything from blogging any more.
I’ve quickly realised that I used blogging as an excuse to not do other things, whilst also not really putting the effort into blogging either. This blog became a scapegoat for not taking better care of myself, and trying to further myself both personally and professionally.
“I barely find the time to blog, so I how am I meant to find time for X, Y or Z?”
I don’t remember the precise moment that I came to this realisation, but I know now that even as I type this post on a quiet Sunday night, I could be doing something more constructive. I could be working on projects that are already underway, that could be more beneficial to me. The only reason I’m not doing that is because I’ve spent the past couple of hours doing it and my “creative flow” led me here.
It’s funny how your mind works, creatively, isn’t it?
In the past, I really loved putting together a new blog post. I do still feel that fire when I get “round to doing it” – and I even feel it now as I ramble here. Once I get into the flow of things, I remember why I started blogging in the first place.
But then I remember that I am not a full time blogger. I don’t want to be.
I have other aspirations both for my career and my personal life. Blogging is just a hobby, not an excuse. Not a reason to stop trying to succeed in other areas of my life because I feel the need to not let myself, or my readers down when it comes to this space on the internet.
I don’t want to give up on this, but I don’t want to slip back into bad habits and spend my time on here instead of focusing it on ways to grow.
I will be back – there’s things I want to prioritise for now so that when I start blogging “properly” again, it’s no longer taking away energy and time from other endeavours.
So, y’know… if you have any tips on inventing more time and energy in the day to fit in full time work, side projects and blogging…they’d be much appreciated.